Rare Negativity

Now I'm not saying I'm never a negative person, I'm merely implying that my admiration for the positives in this topsy turvy world are more common than me wanting to put a gun to everyone's head all of the time. Its just that I have nothing to complain about and everything to celebrate. So a rotten attitude would ruin that.
Here I go, making it seem as if I am super care free again. Its not always like that. There ARE grey areas. Its not just today ill wear an outfit that says "Hi, I'm a tremendous slut."
and then the next, ill wear one that says "Hello, would you like a copy of the Watchtower?"
So yes. I can be rude, cranky, irritable, and impatient.
And no. I do not skip around flower feilds tralala-ing, collect money for the homeless, or spend my free time studying for the 50 extra classes i took for "the fun of it"
But i do consider myself a nice person. Which, in turn, explains my rare negativity.

Life's Treasure

I run around the world,
searching for the truth that can never be found.
What is it?
I don't know.
Nobody does.
That's the point.
You can spend your whole life looking for something that is near perfection.
Something that might not even exist.
So why do I waste my time?
Maybe it gives me the one thing that nobody can ever take away from me.
Hope.
And whether I find it or not,
from now until forever,
I will never stop hoping.

What are words to describe my fears?
What could possibly put my insecurities on pure, permanent paper?

Violence and corruption,
when will there be an end?
How can i be supportive for such a choice when i know the dangers that follow?
I see the brave souls sacrificing themselves on the crime filled battlefeild in society.
But i dont want that for you. I want you to be happy and proud of yourself and your choices.
But safety is a concern as well. Ill admit it is out of selfishness that my feelings are so foward.
As I worry about you, i worry about me, our future, my composure.
I pray that one day, i will be comfortable with the fact that you are so detirmined to be someone of importance.
You are full of goodness and compassion. I am proud of your dreams.
So do what you want. What you feel is right. Because i will always be there at the end of the day.
Just promise you will keep coming home to me.

Food feelings

Talking about lemons could be considered a normal, yet boring conversation. But I cant stand the subject. It's horrible sour taste creeps up into my mind and makes me feel the tartness on the sides of my mouth. It angers me to the end of the earth, that even when i am not eating them, they can get to me. Their evil nectar just taints all other ingredients and makes them undesirable. They have a bright yellow disguise to hide their devlish core of sour. I hate them with a firey passion that burns with every sip, bite, or slurp I take.

Lemons suck.